Trying to make sense and make a link

10-9-2011

A date to remember

After wrestling with the fact, my stubbornness brought me down

Resisting to rest, I kept on playing, putting stress on my injured knee

And then, a "pop" sound ended my season, finally..

When I look back now

Comparing to the my current stage

I start to understand

Understand the reason why people said rejoice while you're going thru struggles

I didn't remember myself getting overly upset about the injury

You can say that I've injured myself so many times that I was already used to it

That's quite true, over a period of 2-3 months, I've been lifted off the court countless times

Till a point that I'm officially termed a "glass man"

However, the MRI result really stunned me..

At the same time, brought me to a whole new chapter of life

It's like I was refreshed!

Yeap, the injury not only made me a more cheerful person, but also a more determined one

I admit I did look back and thought about what I should and should not have done..regretful much? hmm not really tho..

Why did I feel refreshed?

It all just seems to happen at the right time

I was going through some low/soulless times before the injury

I felt so lazy towards many things

Because of the "not quite there yet" injuries (before the acl tear)

I felt like my joy of playing basketball was taken away

Even though I tried very hard to play or even just shoot the ball

I still couldn't get the joy of playing, AT ALL

I stopped going to gym, I stopped being passionate about many things

I stopped being myself, the always motivated me

For that few months, I felt so weak whenever I looked into the mirror

The only thing I held on to, is my faith

Even though I was barely there

Somehow, a special force would always come at the very last minute

Just when I was about to let go

The joy of sacrifice would always be there, whenever I chose to do something for someone

So for those months, I held on to this special force, with just a little bit of strength left in me

AND the times come..

And slowly I started to accept the fact that a tear is a tear

And after countless basketball videos and praise and worship songs sang

I finally found my motivation, the long lost one

I started going back to gym, I started waking up early and try to sleep early, again..

And gradually I felt rejuvenated, and stronger than ever

This is when things started to change, for the better

Thru church, thru basketball, thru people

My life was put into order again

Thanks to the blessings and care from the people

And new people was put into my life

Just as a dose of hope, which I've dearly missed

I am able to smile and laugh easily

I even started to cry more easily, out of joy and not sorrow

This injury has become THE topic starter

I was able to feel people's love and care thru this injury

I was able to be hopeful again

And joy was poured into my life abundantly


Basketball wise, I've never been calmer on the court
(As I still secretly play a bit, no big movements)
I started to figure a lot of things out
I become a better passer, discovered a better court vision
And a better shooter as well
All thanks to the fact that I can't run fast and jump high
I start to play with my brain more
Instead of relying on my brainless muscles every time

It has been almost 2 months now

I can't said that my life was changed radically

But definitely, my heart and spiritual life have been transformed to a whole new level

I've started to trust more

I've started to worry less

And loving people, has never been easier now

And this effect is inside-out

THANKS TO THE ACL TEAR!

It all makes sense now and things link!

I'm loving it! I can't wait for more!

As I continue to trust and live for Him!

"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."